Awkwardness and Innocence

Well what do I say. I read a book from Joel Osteen and he reaffirms my belief in a higher power but I still seem stuck here. But where is here? Is here the place I needed to be for my daughter and grandson? Is here to try and not care for someone who needs it but doesn't see it? But I can't -I care for all so much. And I still have realized as much as I forgive I still harbor resentment deep down. Sucks. But I know that with the proper spiritual help I shall overcome these obstacles...And I know that the people in my life will be blessed whether they know it or not.